Stories/Lived Experiences
Author: Deirdre Delaney, accredited psychotherapist (M.I.A.H.I.P, MCPI) and a tutor with the department of adult and community education in Maynooth University.
The Adult Education programme run by Maynooth University reaches all parts of Ireland. Every year our Addiction and Psychology certificate and diploma programmes gather from all around the country to share a day of presentations and workshops on the Maynooth campus. It is a very important day in our academic calendar but of course over the last two years we were unable to gather. Though an online day was organised, the pandemic never felt more real. Students and tutors alike missed the opportunity to be together with others on campus. For many students it will be their first time to set foot on a university campus. I always hope that it won’t be their last time.
My predominant thought on Saturday 26th February 2022 was that we were finally together again in Maynooth. The last time I had been in a large crowd of people was in February 2020, on our last in person workshop day. We had absolutely no idea what the following two years would bring for us as we sat side by side, mask free. During the various lockdowns, I often thought back to that day, almost incredulous that it had happened, and wondering if we would ever be together in the same way again. But the pandemic feels like it’s someway behind us as I entered the John Hume Building and heard the buzz of excited students looking forward to a day of learning. This is, for me, a key element of the Certificate in Psychology, a course I have tutored for over 10 years. The welcome of tea and coffee and the anticipation of the day ahead left me feeling warm and cosy.
We all made our way into the lecture theatre and saw our panel of speakers were already waiting for us.
Mark Richardson was first up from the panel and took care to introduce himself and the Growing Space team: Michele, Nic and Marette. He had a lovely style of presenting, relaxed but confident. Mark first shared his own journey through adult education, in many ways mirroring my own. He too had come to third level education later in life and had found a love of sharing education with others who may not have had early opportunities in life. Indeed, his journey probably reflected the experiences (or aspirations) of most people in the room. Once my ear grew accustomed to the Welsh lilt, I settled in to learn what had brought this group of people to Maynooth University on a Saturday morning in February.
As the morning unfolded, we were introduced to their branch of Growing Space, situated in Gwent, Wales. What happened in this place was a concept, a carefully considered but flexible approach to supporting people into recovery from mental health issues. The history of Growing space in Gwent was like the history of many volunteer led organisations, some of which I have worked for myself. It started out with the best of intentions but without appropriate funding or strong leadership it became a place where people gathered, gossip thrived, and nobody moved on. But Mark’s almost accidental arrival in Growing Space changed its fortunes and the lives of those who needed its support. I was reminded then how important a leader with a vision is, for any organisation, big or small.
Listening to the life stories of Michele and Marette I felt very moved. As someone who works therapeutically in the community with people suffering with mental health and addiction issues, I was struck by the sheer courage that these women were showing in sharing their stories with us, a lecture theatre full of complete strangers. Michele and Marette allowed us a glimpse of their private worlds, of their early trauma, their deep pain and sadness but most importantly their resilience and recovery. I was struck by the light touch approach of Mark and his team towards supporting Michelle and Marette. To be honest I felt a bit envious. I have worked in a number of similar areas but found myself bound by statistics and funding. The growing emphasis on satisfying funders KPIs often means that clients have to move on before they are ready to. Mark was describing support that sounded like being a good gardener, “a little and often”. My personal belief is that the erosion of a person occurs over a long time, usually years. But we live in a world of short-term therapies, 6 weeks, 12 weeks etc. We want cost effective quick fixes, so we just stick a plaster over a wound in that short space of time. In Growing Space those who need it are given time. Time to build relationships, time to build confidence, time to feel safe and when that time has passed, time to learn. Ultimately, people get the time they need to start to recover.
There was a great buzz in the lecture theatre as we broke for coffee. Some of the Psychology students bumped into Michele and Marette outside while having their cigarette break and came back full of the joy and enthusiasm they had all shared. When the floor was opened to the audience for questions, to the surprise of most, there were no questions, just feedback. Positive feedback for the bravery of Michele and Marette but less positive feedback for how the presentation was delivered. There was a suggestion that asking clients to share their trauma in such a public way may have been overwhelming or inappropriate. I sensed a collective deflation in the room. Somehow the point had been missed and in missing the point there seemed to be a real risk that Michele and Marette would once again experience the rejection and trauma that they were recovering from, albeit vicariously. But recovery and resilience shone through when Marette took the microphone and explained calmly and clearly that she was consulted at all stages of the planning of the presentation, and she was happy with it. That was all I needed to hear.
My workshop that afternoon was a reflection on working from a trauma informed perspective in the area of recovery. We were able to clearly map the work of Mark and the team in Growing Space against the principles and outcomes of working in a trauma informed way. I gave the last word in my workshop to an expert in recovery, Bessel Van Der Kolk, and I feel that he should have the last word here. I believe that I saw this recovery in action in Maynooth on a Saturday morning in February 2022.
“Beneath the surface of the protective parts of trauma survivors there exists an undamaged essence, a Self that is confident, curious, and calm, a Self that has been sheltered from destruction by the various protectors that have emerged in their efforts to ensure survival. Once those protectors trust that it is safe to separate, the Self will spontaneously emerge, and the parts can be enlisted in the healing process”. Van Der Kolk (2015)